Piper was born Aug 30th 2010... After a horrific pregnancy filled with constant sickness, early labor, many hospital trips and 10 weeks of bed rest she arrived 3 weeks early... It was such a bittersweet day! All 5 pounds 10oz of Piper Kay Lin
were perfect.. She was so tiny so beautiful.. I had my baby girl! My partner in crime. My fashionista in the making, my blonde haired blued eyed mini me! My family was complete... Even though small she was seemingly healthy and we were soon home.. The first 3 weeks home were amazing... She slept good, ate good and was so sweet.. Then our nightmare started.. The crying, the throwing up, the pain and up all nights.. I couldn't for the life of me figure out what was happening.. At first we were told colic.. So we tried the colic remedies.. Nothing worked.. Then she refused to eat.. After 2 doctors we were told she had Acid Reflux.. Ugh, those words make me sick! After hearing her esophagus was basically eroding , I stopped breast feeding.. Formula after formula we finally found something that "helped".. And I use that word loosely! The symptoms were still there just simmered down a bit. Then Prevacid was added.. Try giving a 3 month old, by this point, a broken capsule of medicine.. Not easy and wasn't very effective.. So until she could eat cereal it was just deal with it mode.. I was a zombie, literally.. I went days without sleep.. Without silence. It was hell... For us all.. There were times I thought "why is she doing this?" And then guilt for thinking that.. It was a vicious cycle.. Up all night, cry for us both, throw up, sleep an hour, up all day and then start again.. One night she threw up all over her bed and when I picked her up then all over me.. Clint came in and started cleaning us... I just looked at him and asked him to go away and I just broke down.. I Sat in the middle of her room covered in vomit and cried, a lot! Why was this happening to us? Why couldn't I fix it? How was I going to survive this?....
Months past and not much changed.. Things got slightly better but I think mostly it became the "norm" for us.. But I kept drifting further away from Piper.. It was awful.. I just couldn't make a connection. I was in survival mode.
Finally her first birthday came.. Not only was she a year old, no more reflux!! I could take her off her meds, off that nasty $25 a tiny can formula! The start of a new life.. Or so I thought... Through all the reflux battle, Piper had tubes put in her ears at 8 months! This was to hopefully stop the infections caused by all the fluid that was in her lil head... So as she turned one things started looking up! It was all going to get better. Right??.
For a few months life was pretty good. Then, the ear infections started back up.. Inner ear, antibiotics, outer ear, drops, 3 weeks, inner ear, repeat cycle... Was this a joke?!? Why can't my baby just be healthy?! It just wasn't fair! As development stages started her speech was just not cutting it.. Her tantrums were beyond belief crazy.. The bedtimes became unbearable.. I was with the kids 24 hours a day 7 days a week... I had a family to take care of but I was a functioning lunatic! LOL... I was in a fog at almost all times... Piper took everything I had, and what little energy I did have went to Brody... Poor Clint was left with nothing.. By the time he got home from work I was done, tapped out... It was rough for us all.
After several appointments Piper was referred to a sleep specialist.. Seriously?? She has night terrors and sleep disorder?? Can this ride get anymore twisted!..
. I finally insisted on seeing an ENT again... Best decision we ever made! Come to find out Pipers right ear was completely blocked and her reasons for not sleeping were probably due to slight vertigo... Needless to say the sleep study BS was canceled and an appointment for new tubes and adenoid removal was made.. On Dec 5th we went to the hospital and had her surgery.. I prayed and prayed this would work.. I needed my daughter healthy.. I needed my daughter! I wanted what most moms had.. The snuggles, the smiles, the play time, the sweet kisses goodnight.. I wanted a bond, not just the that's my kid bond, but the that's my life walking around in that lil baby girl bond.. Piper and I both needed that!..After one day the difference was instant! The look on her face when she reacted to sounds was just amazing.. Her eyes were brighter, her speech clearer her smile bigger!
It's been 23 days since her surgery.. The best times of our lives together have been in those days... Don't get me wrong, Piper is rotten, spoiled rotten! She is a diva.. It's her way or the highway.. I call her my lil sour patch kid :).. But I wouldn't have her any other way! She's perfect.. I look forward to waking her up in the morning, lunches, play time, taking her places.. And my favorite, those sweet night night hugs and kisses... There is nothing more precious than hearing that deep raspy voice say "kiss momma, I lubb you, night night"... Melts my heart each time.. It took me 9 prego months, 2 years and 3 months but I have my baby girl!! When I look back on it all I realize it is the way it should be.. What we went through made us stronger..
I am so grateful for Clint.. Who may not have understood this madness but still supported me... And for my friends and family.. No one understands though unless they've been thru it... There is nothing a mom of a reflux baby could say to me that I haven't done or thought... God took me to my limit for sure.. But the reward was worth it.. Seeing my bright eyed baby girls makes me forget all that bad stuff.. Watching her and Brody play together would melt the coldest of hearts... They are best friends... It's beautiful... Christmas was so wonderful... It was the first holiday with Piper that was fun and easy! There were no meltdowns no sickness... I truly am blessed beyond measure... My life my not be perfect, but its perfect for us! :-)
So for any of my FB Mom's going thru this, I understand.. I get it! And I promise you there is light at the end of the tunnel.. It does get better.. Just stay strong.. And remember to walk away sometimes, go outside, breathe and scream at the top of your lungs. It's true, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger :)
Luv, Megs 😘😘
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